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Archive for July, 2020

An Off To Live With Me In a Huge Paradise Area

Less than 500 miles from Vegas is a near untouched paradise, it has fish, lakes, probably deer, and huge shelters (I will explain that strangeness if you fully commit to helping and I see you’re not some criminal or irrational new age wacko. I have a storage unit full of druzy quartz, coolware, many books, nice, HEAVY stuff.

I have 33 baby chicks and do not want them growing up in Loserville Borington Hellhole Zone not even the waterfalls I made and try to live at, but cannot as it is very messy, cramped, ant-filled, noisy (waterfalls will wear out your ears, so will a running creek) and a very long, big pain to get in and out of.

I was severely injured by a speeding truck a few months ago, it severed bicep muscles, requires surgery to repair, and due to cops harassing me to near death in burning weather and the rough terrain I live at now barely have strength left, and I do mean literal and repeat verifiable blatant harassment.

Anyways, I have fishing gear and cookware, building materials, tools, solar panels, unfortunately no shortwave radio or walkie talkies, no thanks to thieving cops who literally robbed me of nearly a $1000 worth of tech I bought with my disability income, the last of it, and you burglarized and robbed me, both!

Moving on. If you are the adventurous type, strong yet curvy and soft, without gorilla-like man-hands (see Seinfeld for reference), go exploring with me till we experience the glory of snakes attacking our snake boots (sadly I have none) and pointing in amazement at their foolishness of daring toto damage our boots.

If mountain lions show up and jump on us, don’t worry, I can kick very hard, I’m somewhat hopeful the chickens will save us if that doesn’t work. If it doesn’t I may use my snake-hand puppet and hiss, or play a lion-roaring on my little bluetooth speaker, possibly saying, “Thanks for ruining my day ” or looking completely unimpressed and disappointed at any attacks may repel such beats. Or, bear mace may work, yet I have none, and my dollar store sunglasses keep breaking.

This offer of paradise living amongst nasty beasts, centipedes and spiders hiding who knows where and amongst the ruins of massive art-deco-like Iron Man mansion strangely set into a wild creek is also on my blog. So just google, The Offer of Aquaman to live at Iron Man’s place, after having been bombed out it seems.

No, this is no joke, April is long past. If you have allergies, that’s bad, if a noisy hideous disobedient dog or cat, bad too. If you scare very easy, bad, if you like rap, or sing horribly, tap your fingers too much or at all, stomp your feet a lot and snore, don’t like scouting for nice rocks or fossils, hate stars: all bad.

I would show this place but do not want feds pestering me, or robbers to come looking for me, or you.

Aquaman