The Short Time I Had With My Kitten, Baby
So, with a loan from an acquaintance I got $100 to use on my cat at the vet, and spent it all yesterday on her. I wanted to comment about this experience I had just now, which was force feeding her cat food since she couldn’t eat due to her having pierced either side of her tongue with her teeth when I, I reason, let her bite at my sleeves when I let her out soon after having caught her two or three days ago. What I wanted to comment on was that despite me having tube-bottle fed her about an hour ago and her gagging and screaming briefly at times when choking, and her sort of begging me I suppose to stop, and letting her down – that when I let her down on my sleeping bag at one point, she was purring and kneading it! She either realized I was trying to help her eat, and realized with her God-given intelligence that I wasn’t causing her pain on purpose and/or felt satisfied with what little food I was able to feed her. But it is also amazing that even if she thought I was causing her such great pain on purpose, that she after such great pain, and her having yellow mucous clogging her nose (and me wiping it away at times) that she would be euphoric seconds later, still sick, still in pain, still hardly having eaten!
At first I thought the holes in her mouth was my fault, if it did happen by letting her bite my sleeves or sleeve (though she was biting an animal-toy I put in the cage too – 1/18/2015 I just realized as of updating this post that she had bitten her tongue while still in her cage from the expression she gave me before I had taken her out of the cage – and indication she was able to eat well before as there was a full can inside that had been devoured and when I put in another she began to eat that one too – which was when she stuck it out at one point, which is only something a cat will do if they are comfortable, with the exception of what I am describing now or some disease), but it could have easily just has happened had I taken the long way of letting her get used to me over the weeks, because it is just as possible that when trying to pet her for the first time even after having waited many days, letting her bite my sleeve or some toy, that she would have pierced her tongue anyways. In a way I could argue I sped things up so that this will be unlikely to happen again. I performed surgery on the right side of her tongue because I saw it was a thread nearly on the right side of the right hole on her tongue and was causing her great pain when moving her tongue. I think it was getting caught on her teeth and getting repeatedly stretch on her food or teeth, and it looked yellow white, clearly infected, so I use a knife and scissors to cut it off. It looks as if a lot of material got destroyed on that side of her tongue though, as if something had taken a big bite out of her tongue.
I still owe the vet $16 (1/18/2015 – it now stands at $200 or more in multiple a last ditch attempts I made to save her life, not getting any sleep for days and in my last attempt biking early in the morning in freezing cold with only a shirt on on a brakeless bike using my jackets to shield her from the cold and warming her against my belly, but was told it was a lost cause and she likely had massive infection and dual kidney failure – would have been over $400 and I was perfectly willing, but the vet seeing my condition was looking for something less expensive and injected her with saline rather than keeping her overnight at my request, and my Wells Fargo debt card repeatedly rejected even a small down payment anyways). But imagine this cat had been stolen from me after all these, and slandered or treated callously as had the security guard at Vons and UNLV sorority girls and campus police there, acting as if I was an abuser by whoever stole it, or aiding the thief, can you understand how I feel about my stolen cats and kittens when you think of it that way? What I mean is, I suffered hard and long, I long-suffered, I slaved over my cats and kittens, and yet had them stolen from me and was slandered as having abused them, and called an animal abuser by these thieves. How can a pet thief taking this young cat I rescued (who was bony to begin with and sick), stealing that kitten from me after I had painstakingly performed surgery on her, gotten slimed with cat food repeatedly in very cold weather, in a dirty abandoned house where feces used to be on the rug (which I removed in the room I had done surgery in), dirty with dust, having gotten my own saliva all over me from biting onto a bicycle flashlight to see what I was doing including while feeding her, and then someone is going to call me in their self righteousness a cat abuser and steal her? How can such a thief not be executed or lashed hard 40 times in public as at least a partial punishment for such even acts, such arrogance, such carelessness, such thoughtlessness, such callous behavior for the life of the animal they stole and the owner whom they slandered, who is in great pain, suffering from psoriasis non-stop from the stress of endless oppression, endless harassment, decades of memories of abuse and sorrowful experiences, having been suicidal from abuse as a child and in adulthood, suicidal for at least 10 years, and someone is going to take my pet away because they assume that based on their glance-judgment, they know better than me, and because they see me who looks poor, must therefore be a bad person or have inferior morals, wisdom or judgment, or because I disagree with some opinion of theirs, one they presumed was right in their arrogance of believing they are superior for whatever reason? Such thieves, such slanderers should be executed.
11/18/2015 At 6 AM I got her to the vet, and I took her home when the doctor gave me a dire judgment, and about 7 AM my little angel after spending hours in extreme pain, died in my arms. God decided to take her away from Hellish world early, away from the self-centered citizens of Las Vegas and the rest of the world, who treated her as a homeless person, like dirt, even though pretending to be loving, kind, good or decent.
I’ll always love you, I’ll miss your purrs, your kneading when you were happy, your head rubs, and wonder what could have been.
Jan 28 Update: (If you would like to fund my life and those of my kittens and cats – and that includes helping me get the $s pay off my $100+ vetrinarian debt for the rescued kitten that died – please sign up for free Speedcoins, which is an alternative cryptocurrency/digital currency to Bitcoins, you can also get free Speedcoins, 110 of them as I just did in a few minutes by signing up and installing a Speedcoin wallet on my Android tablet. You don’t need a credit card or give out your email. Just click here to sign up.)